As dating norms shift with each generation, new trends emerge that redefine what people look for in relationships. The latest Gen Z trend, known as ‘throning,’ highlights a different kind of motivation in dating: choosing partners based on social status rather than genuine connection. PureWow describes “throning” as dating someone who enhances your image or reputation, effectively putting them on a “throne” for the clout they bring to the relationship.

This trend raises questions about the role of social influence in modern dating and how it affects the authenticity of romantic connections. Are ‘throners’ simply seeking validation, or is this behaviour indicative of deeper social patterns?

Psychological reasons behind the desire to date someone primarily for social status

“The trend of throning for social status or clout often stems from a strong desire to be validated, acknowledged and accepted socially,” says Sonal Khangarot, licensed rehabilitation counsellor and psychotherapist, The Answer Room. This can uproot from a place of fractured self esteem, lack of emotional validation, not feeling content in one’s own skin and life. The drive can further be linked to lack of inner fulfilment which one feels can’t be attained on their 

Impact on emotional well-being and self-esteem

Khangarot states, “For someone dating for recognition, there is often a lingering sense of unfulfillment and inadequacy. The sense of worth depends on external validation rather than intrinsic values that the partner holds, which can lead to a cycle of superficial validation followed by emptiness as a genuine connection and shared values are often missing.” 

The partner being dated because of their social status may feel hurt, used, or desired only because of who they are and what their full name is, which can lead to trust issues and a feeling of objectification, she mentions. “The dynamic would often erode both parties’ self-esteem and leave them feeling emotionally disconnected.”

Has the rise of social media influenced more people to seek validation through status-driven relationships?

In today’s world, Khangarot believes that there’s a sense that if you’re not active on social media, you don’t exist. Social media provides visibility, with popular terms like “power couple” and “relationship goals” fueling the idealisation of high-status partnerships. When people are captivated by these notions, they may seek relationships that boost their social image, using them to meet unmet personal needs for recognition and acceptance

Advice for someone who is dating for clout but feels unfulfilled emotionally

If you’re in a relationship primarily for social recognition, reflecting on where this need for validation originates is essential. “Ask yourself: Do you genuinely feel happy, or are you simply projecting happiness? Clarifying your life priorities and focusing on your interests and values can help build healthier self-worth, which complements rather than depends on your partner’s status,” recommends Khangarot. 

Healthy relationships are built on trust, mutual understanding, and emotional connection; without these, the relationship may falter quickly. Use this realisation as a chance to “refuel” and ensure that your foundation — your self-worth and values — is strong and free from external dependencies.

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